G      320003
C      x32013
F      xx3211
C/G    302013

[Verse 1]
G
Bishop danced with a thumbscrew woman
                                 C               G
Did a double-quick back flip and slid across the floor
    C                       G
The Catholic traffic flowed freely 'cross the river
                              D             C    G
And fiddlestick fiddled quick out the front door

[Verse 2]
G
Oh baby dumpling, mama's in the back tree
                  C          G
If the bow breaks mama might fall
G                    C                       
Little sad and only, baby don't be lonely
G                            C             G
Mama knows 'rithmatic, knows how to take a fall
G                            D             C    G
Mama knows 'rithmatic, knows how to take a fall

[Chorus]
G                        C                       G
And the kids are crying "Flapjacks, make'em fat, early in the mornin'
C                           G
Little Jack, grab your hat, hear the breakfast call
C                   G
Muskrat, bat a cat, kick him in the fireplace
        G 
There's someone in the kitchen blowing "Dinah" on their horn
        G                               D                   C    G
There's someone in the kitchen blowing "Dinah" like they're born

[Verse 3]
     G
Well maverick daddy got one-eyed bridge
                              Em             C
She glides like a monkey-mule kicking on the back slide
C                     G
Over hill, over hill, daddy don't you spill now
G                             C              G
Papa got a switch stick, he's pumping little Bill
G                             D              C    G
Papa got a switch stick, he's pumping little Bill

[Verse 4]
    G                   C                   G
And Billy, he's crying "Tomahawk, tomahawk, daddy better duck now"
    C                                   G
The Mohawks, the Mohawks, they're still out there in the woods
C                G
Monatuk, Ocanuk, runnin' through my dreams now
     G
With fire on their fingertips and indian screams
     G                            D                C         G
With fire on their fingertips and feathers made of moonbeams

[Instrumental]
G   C   G  x2

[Verse 5]
     G 
Well early in the morning the cannoneer cried
   G
"I seen the sailor's warning in the western sky"
     C                         G
Well mountain man, if you can, cut me down a fir tree
C                                 D        G   C   G
Branches full of candlesticks for baby and me

[Verse 6]
G                               C    
And my darling cried, she said "Honey, the weathervane
                 C/G
Lately it's been pointing the way to heaven
C                                                 G
Scatterbrains, scatterbrains, watch out where you fall
C                                         G
Champagne, champagne, a round for all the old choir boys
        G
They're busting off the altar chasing Dinah through the hall
        G                             D                 C    G
They're bustin' off the altar chasing Dinah through the hall

[Chorus]
G                        C                       G
And the kids are crying "Flapjacks, make'em fat, early in the mornin'
C                           G
Little Jack, grab your hat, hear the breakfast call
C                   G
Muskrat, bat a cat, kick him in the fireplace
        G 
There's someone in the kitchen blowing "Dinah" on their horn
        G                               D                   C    G
There's someone in the kitchen blowing "Dinah" like they're born

[Instrumental]
G   C   G  x2

[Chorus]
G                        C                       G
And the kids are crying "Flapjacks, make'em fat, early in the mornin'
C                           G
Little Jack, grab your hat, hear the breakfast call
C                   G
Muskrat, bat a cat, kick him in the fireplace
        G 
There's someone in the kitchen blowing "Dinah" on their horn
        G                               D                   C    G
There's someone in the kitchen blowing "Dinah" like they're born