Bm G A
Bm G A
D G A
D G A

[Verse 1]
       D                        G
Do you take this woman? I said "Yes, I do"
  D                      G                  A
I love her like crazy, I think she loves me too
          D                             G               A
But we'll do without the family if it's all the same to you
D     G    A
Happy ever after


[Verse 2]
     D                    G
Your mother's a flake, My father's full of shite
     D                             G               A
Your sister says you married me in white, just for spite
  D                           G            A
A party's not a party till it ends up in a fight
D     G    A  D
Happy ever after


[Chorus]
            G                       D           A
And there's my lot and your lot and us two in between
       D                G               A
Please God, this is the last time I get married
       D                G               A   D
Please God, this is the last time I get married


[Instrumetnal]

D G A


[Verse 3]
   D                          G
My brother's never short of a substance to abuse
D                       G                A
Rum, glue, Thunderbird, Wizz and Special Brew
D                            G            A
Any minute now he'll show us all of his tattoos
D     G    A
Happy ever after


[Verse 4]
D                      G
Nephews are obnoxious, nieces are too tall
  D                        G              A
A dozen drunken uncles are pissing up the wall
D                                G              A
Granddad is grinning but there's no one home at all
D     G    A  D
Happy ever after


[Chorus]
            G                       D           A
            G                       D           A
And there's my lot and your lot and us two in between
       D                G               A   D
Please God, this is the last time I get married
       D                G               A   D
Please God, this is the last time I get married

[Bridge]
    Bm                      G         A
For richer, for poorer, for better or worse
Bm                    G             A
Now we are married, a blessing or a curse
D                        A
Kiss me and don't forget
D        G      A        D
What you see is what you get
D G A
D G A

[Verse 5]
        D                              G
And the best man is the worst man, the best man is a beast
D                             G             A
Underneath the table with the sister of the priest
    D                           G          A
The way he's going at it, she's probably deceased
D     G    A
Happy ever after

[Verse 6]
D                    G
Gran's on the brandy getting bleary-eyed
D                                  G         A
Guys I went to school with want to see me outside
D                                    G               A
Someone's pulled the bridesmaid, has anyone seen the bride?
D     G    A
Happy ever after

[Chorus]
            G                       D           A
And there's my lot and your lot and us two in between
   D                 G               A   D
I swear, this is the last time I get married
    D                 G               A   D
I'm sure, this is the last time I get married
       D                G               A   D
Please God, this is the last time I get married
       D                G               A   D
Please God, this is the last time I get married


[Spoken]

Bm                                                         A
  Those who God hath joined together let no man put asunder.
            Bm
If there is anyone here who has just cause or impediment for why these two people should not be
         G                         D
joined together in holy matrimony, let them now declare.


[Instrumental]
D G A
D G A
D G A